Far From The Home I Love
by simplyfoxx
Summary: While trying to overcome the life-altering event of two summers ago, Bella shut everyone out. Because of this, she is now forced to attend public school to receive some human interaction. All is not so fine and well in Forks High, but soon Bella will find out that a stranger, the only person who seems to be disinterested in her life, is really the one she's needed all along. AH
1. Prologue

**A/N: Hello, fellow readers! This was developed in my notebook and was only meant for me to read when I'm lonely (which is quite often). It will involve some dark themes at first. Beware of language and lemons to come. Please give it a chance! Review! It leads to faster updates..**

_Far From the Home I Love - Fiddler on the Roof_

_How can I hope to make you understand  
Why I do, what I do,  
Why I must travel to a distant land  
Far from the home I love?_

Once I was happily content to be  
As I was, where I was  
Close to the people who are close to me  
Here in the home I love...

Who could see that a man would come  
Who would change the shapes of my dreams?  
Helpless, now, I stand with him  
Watching older dreams grow dim.  
Oh, what a melancholy choice this is,  
Wanting home, wanting him,  
Closing my heart to every hope but his,  
Leaving the home I love.

There where my heart has settled long ago,  
I must go, I must go.  
Who could imagine I'd be wand'ring so  
Far from the home I love?

* * *

"I'll always love you, Bella." His lips ghost across mine.

I nod. His fingertips caress my cheek, eliciting a shiver from me.

Our eyes meet, and I'm hypnotized in the brown pools.

His hand travels downward, brushing past the swell of my breasts before finding its way to the hem of worn cotton.

He tugs, and I'm sent back to reality.

"Jacob, we can't do this." His eyes darken.

"My sweet Isabella, allow me to savor every curve of your luscious body. Allow me to worship you."

He pulls my shirt off as I stare blankly at the wall.

"Please, don't." Tears form in my eyes.

"Shhh." His warm finger presses gently to my chapped lip, and I'm afraid. He fumbles with the button of my jeans before slowly lowering the zipper. I try to pull his hand away, but he's relentless.

"No. Please!" I beg. I cry. I kick. But he's too far gone. Soon I'm without clothes and pinned against the bed post, and then I'm taken.


	2. Pondering

**A/N: I can't tell you how honored I am that so many people have given this story a chance. Review, review, review please! I need input. You guys can really help me take this somewhere. Thanks for reading!**

* * *

_Chapter 1_

I tumble off the bed, sweat coating my skin. _It was only a dream? _I let out an exasperated cry. I have been tortured by these nightmares on and off for the past 2 years. They have stolen countless nights from me, refusing to let go. It's always the same, and I believe it creates more anguish than if they varied. No one knows what happened that warm summer night. I refuse to humiliate myself, and no one would believe me anyways. Jacob Black, with the big, white, toothy grin? The son of Billy Black? Not possible! I was 15 and foolish, confusing the constant lustful glint in my rapist's eyes with love.

I attempt sleep, but soon find it's impossible. Taking a peek at the sterile clock on the east wall, I remove myself from the the shaggy comforter and brush the invisible lint of my pajama pants. I pull on a sweater and look in the mirror, seeing death. My mascara is smeared due to the most recent night-sobbing, and my hair is in every which direction. My stomach releases a vehement growl, so I decide to treat myself to breakfast.

I stumble through the makeshift kitchen with foggy morning vision and open the protesting fridge. It was on it's last leg. I grab the carton of eggs and open creaking cupboards, at one point causing pots and pans to hurtle towards the tile, creating a very powerful cacophony. A few minutes after the incident, I hear heavy footsteps above me.

"What in hell's name was that?" I wince at his demanding tone. _Shit!_

"Um, well... Nothing. Just dropped some pans."

"Well can you turn it down a notch? Some of us actually need sleep," he mumbles lethargically.

"Sure, sure," I recoil at the phrase I acquired due to the amount of times Jacob used it. I never could rid myself of the habit.

He lets out one last huff before stomping up the stairs and slamming the door. He wasn't much of a morning person.

I hear the familiar clicking sound of the stove as it flickers to life. I grab a bowl and crack 2 eggs open. As I start whisking, thoughts of this coming Monday float through my mind. I've been home schooled basically my whole life. But apparently, I've become dangerously depressed and anti-social and need some human interaction. I'm not going to deny it, though. I can understand Charlie's reasoning, considering he has absolutely no clue what is actually going on in my life.

I pour the eggs into the pan and scramble them. I didn't eat breakfast much, but I did love cooking. It was an escape for me. Continuing to sort out my expectations, I started becoming hopeful. Any change is better than no change, right? Besides, it's high school! How bad could it possibly be...?

* * *

**I'm sorry to say that I won't be posting this often all the time; I just happened to have some free time tonight. But I will try to update whenever I can! Hugs!**


	3. Leaving

**A/N: Sorry I haven't updated! I've been terribly sick for the past few days. Please review!**

I wipe egg remnants off the corner of my mouth. Scooting back the dilapidated island chair, I drop my fork down on the plate and take it to the sink.

After finishing the dishes, I glance out the bay window overlooking the front yard. My rusty Ford is seated by Charlie's police cruiser, and I decide to take it for a ride. I saunter up the stairs and walk into my bedroom. After briefly inspecting it, I wrench open the sliding door of my closet and pull out my faded jeans and sweatshirt. I was afraid to dress anything less than modest.

As I was making my way out the door, I hear a shrill ring. The phone is vibrating on the kitchen counter. It reads **'**_**Unknown'**. Screw you Caller I.D!_

I pick it up and meekly question, "Hello?"

"Bella?" I sigh in relief at the familiar voice. _Thank God!_

"Hey, Sam. What's up?" Sam's always been a wonderful friend (and my only friend, I might add). He stood by me through all the years of depression, and never once questioned the reasons behind it. Although he has expressed interest in me, I let it go due to the innocence of it.

"Just checking up on you. I've been worried since you haven't called lately an-"

"Sam, I'm fine. Just really busy, you know?" I close my eyes. He tends to ramble when he's nervous.

"Oh. That's good, I guess. Well, I mean, uh-" Yes, definitely nervous about something.

"Just tell me what's wrong."

"Noth-"

"And don't say 'nothing'. I'm not buying it." He grumbles lightly and I feel a smirk forming on my lips.

"Alright, fine." Silence.

"I have to leave, Bella."


	4. First Day

**A/N: I haven't updated in ages! I'm truly sorry. I've been overwhelmingly busy the past month. Anyways, I hope you all had a very merry Christmas! Enjoy and I'll see you on the other side!**

**Warning: There will be some explicit language in this chapter. If you are offended in any way by this, please do not continue reading.**

I remain deposited in my truck for two hours, sobbing. How could he be leaving? He had explained that his father in Illinois had acquired cancer, and needed someone to take care of him, but I remain in denial. I can't imagine him no longer in my life. No one to talk to. No one that understands me. Feeling utterly alone, I drive to a nearby park and stare at the lush forests for an interminable amount of time. My nails are chewed down to nubs in anxiety and I'm pulling out my hair in frustration. My thoughts attempt to travel to much darker times, but I push them away due to the possibly fatal consequences.

Eventually, it starts to rain, soaking my mahogany locks. I pull up the hood of my jacket and sprint across the newly-muddy territory to the heat of my cab. I sort most of my thoughts, but still wonder how I will survive in this cruel world. Wiping the last tear off my cheek, I pull the house key out of my drenched pant pocket and settle it into its designated hole. The sound of the TV enwraps the living room and I see Charlie dozing on his lounger.

I considered dinner, but felt bile rise through my throat at just the thought of eating. The phone sits in it's cradle, subtly taunting me. If I recalled correctly, insanity is attempting the same thing repeatedly and expecting a different outcome. If that is the case, I firmly believe that I have gone absolutely and positively - insane.

* * *

**Monday - September 13th**

My first day of public school has finally arrived. I'm not exactly positive I'm fully prepared for the inevitable scrutiny of being the 'new girl'. Alright, might as well not lie to myself. I'm the farthest possible thing from prepared. The part that really blows is the fact that Sam won't be there for me when I have a full blown panic attack in front of the entire school. Like an imbecile. A lone tear escapes, but I swiftly wipe it off. Now is not the time to be weak. That time will arrive when I'm alone in my bedroom. I'll also have time to acknowledge the fact that I'll never be the same again, and no one could ever possibly want me. No matter how hard I try.

* * *

"Isabella Swan, I take it?"

"Y-yes, sir." The entire class snickers.

"Very well then. Please take a seat in the back row, Miss Swan." I roll my eyes. It would be my pleasure, dickwad. I feel the entire class shift in their seats to watch. Why dont you take a picture? It'll last longer.

You might be curious as to why I'm in such a pissy mood. Well, the answer is quite simple. I'm sick and fucking tired of all the stares, phony smiles, and unneccesary introductions every single damn class period. Frankly, I don't know how these douche bags managed to survive in this hell hole for so long. When the final bell rings in precisely 3 minutes and 24 seconds, I'm hauling ass out of here. I don't think my mental stability is at a safe level, and I feel like cutting some bitches. Someone has already given me the name of a local plastic surgeon with a note saying: You wont even recognize yourself once shes done with you. Thank God for that! I quipped back: I think I'll pass. I don't believe in wasting money on nose jobs that make you look like the Jewish version of Pinnochio. That shut the hoe right up. _  
_

There happened to be one person who seemed to not even give a shit. Only one. I wanted to hunt him down and give him the biggest fucking hug. But he didn't seem like the hugging type. He was attractive, but not in a surfer-dude-with-washboard-abs kind of way. He had a classic look to him that I couldn't quite put my finger on. To say the least, he was the most entertaining part of my day.

**And here we are! I hope you all enjoyed the fiester side to Bella. I just wanted to inform all of you that I am now looking for a beta to help my writing shine like glitter! PM me if you're interested. Happy New Years and I'll see you next chapter!**


	5. AP Biology

_9 Years Earlier_ -_ 3rd Person POV _

"Daddy, can we take a walk on the beach?" Bella's large brown pools silently begged her father.

"Of course, Bells." Charlie grabbed her delicate hand and placed it into his. He would do anything for his beloved daughter.

The car ride there was quiet, neither of them said much. But Bella didn't mind. She stared out the window as the trees continued to fly by. She could faintly see the sunset looming on the horizon behind them.

"The world sure is pretty, daddy." He laughed his low and hearty laugh.

"That it is, sweetheart." A thought came to Bella's mind that she had never really mentioned before.

"What happened to mommy? I know she's in Heaven watching over me and you, but why?" Charlie's head snapped over to see his daughter's questioning features. He was not expecting this.

"Well, when you were a baby, mommy loved you so much that her heart just swelled up so big, she couldn't take it anymore." A single tear pushed past his eye. Bella noticed.

"Oh, daddy I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings." The sad expression on her face caused Charlie to cry some more.

"You didn't, pumpkin. Daddy loves you so much." He leaned over and planted a soft kiss on the top of her forehead.

She giggled and said, "I know you do. And I love you, too."

Charlie parked the car on a sand dune and cut the engine.

"Ready to go, Bella Bear?" She lightly smacked him on the arm.

"Daddy! I told you to stop calling me that!"

"Alright, alright. Let's get going so we can see the sunset." She rapidly nodded her head and followed behind him.

As they started walking, they saw another family sitting close to the water eating dinner.

"Who's that? Bella asked.

"Why, I think that's Carlisle and Esme!" Charlie seemed very excited. Bella was just confused.

Carlisle was leisurely scanning his surroundings when he spotted Charlie with his little girl. He noticed they were watching him, so he waved them over. Charlie grinned and made his way over. Esme was too busy dealing with their sons to notice.

"Well if it isn't Carlisle Cullen! Where have you been all this time?" Carlisle had just moved back to Forks. They had lived in Chicago for three years, but Esme decided she preferred small town living.

"Long time no see, Chief!" They embraced before they both sat. Bella wasn't far behind.

"It certainly has. How did big city livin' treat ya?"

"It had far too many negative connotations than it did positive, I suppose. And what would your name be, sweetheart?" Carlisle glanced at Bella, who was quietly listening to the conversation.

She immediately looked down and stated shyly, "I'm Bella."

"Well isn't that a beautiful name?" She smiles softly. Carlisle always loved children.

Charlie says, "You're going to have to enlighten me on all these fine young men's names. It's been too long." All the young boys turned around.

First, Carlisle pointed to the biggest of the three. "This is my eldest son, Emmett." He looked to be about ten.

"Hello there, Emmett." Emmett had a burly build and curly brown hair.

"'Sup?" Bella laughed. What a silly way to say hello!

Second, he pointed to one with a fairly lanky build, but had muscle. "And this would be Jasper, my middle." He gives a curt nod before his attention is diverted to Emmett flicking his ear.

"Behave boys!" Esme's soft yet commanding voice exclaimed.

"He started it." Jasper said.

"No, you did!" They rolled around in the sand and yelled at each other, seemingly oblivious to the fact that they had company.

"You'll have to forgive them. They can't be tamed at that age." Carlisle says, embarrassed by their behavior.

Then, he pointed to a small boy sitting on the corner of their blanket. "Meet Edward, my youngest." Bella thought Edward was very cute, and he was almost as shy as herself.

"Hello." It was a simple greeting, but Bella liked the way his voice sounded. Her eyes traveled up his features and were met with striking green eyes. They looked like the damp leaves of an oak tree. She was mesmerized by them. Silently wishing her eyes were that pretty, she continued north. She saw the most beautiful disarray of hair. The color of it was something she had never seen before. It was like a penny, except lighter. She noticed that his build was similar to Jasper's, except he was much more pale. Bella looked at her skin tone for a short while, and it was also pale. She looked back up to see Edward staring at her. He quickly teared his eyes away and picked at the blanket.

Bella was going to get to know Edward.

xX End Flashback Xx

"Now class, please take out your textbooks and turn to page 23." AP Biology. It sucks.

"Today we will be studying about Cellular Respiration. Your test for this chapter will be sometime next week."

"First we will discuss the vocabulary. Can anyone define the term oxidation?" Nobody raises their hand.

"Very well then. Isabella, why don't you answer?" The entire class turns around. Except one.

"Let's see. I'm not exactly sure, Mr. Clouting. But I'll take a guess. Oxidation isa reaction in which the atoms in an element lose electrons and the valence of the element is correspondingly increased. Would that be correct?" The entire class snickers. Suck that.

He stares at me for a while, completely dumbfounded. I guess he thought I was an idiot.

"That is, Ms. Swan. Now that we've covered that particular term, let's move on to-" The shrill ring of the dismissal bell interrupts him.

"Nevermind then. Your homework is to read sections one and two, and we will discuss them tomorrow. Clear?" Everyone ignores him and walks out the door.

Right as I'm about to do the same, I hear him say "Isabella, a word please."

I roll my eyes and turn around. "Yes?"

"I would like to inform you that we are having a Science Battle next month. If you are interested, please email me and I will send you the details. My email is on the school webs-"

"Mr. Clouting, allow me to interrupt you right there. I'm going to save you some time and worry. No. I'm not interested. Thanks for the offer though. I'm flattered." I give him my best faux smile before walking out the door, leaving him speechless.

_**To make up for the missed updates, I have given you a semi-long chapter. What did you think of the flashback? Should I do another? I hope that cleared up anything you were confused about. But if you still are wondering about something, please let me know! Thanks for reading, and I'll see you next chapter.**_

_**What was your favorite class in school? What was your least favorite?**_


	6. Right Hook

**A/N: I just wanted to briefly thank all of my loyal readers. There may not be many of you, but I appreciate you a great amount. Enjoy, and I'll see you on the other side.**

The deafening shriek of the alarm bell rang all around us. People scream. I kind of just sit there, plugging my ears.

Over the intercom, I hear "Attention all students. This is not a practice bell. We are currently on lockdown. There are two armed men on the premises. Here are the relocation spots of all grade levels: Freshman - Emergency Room 106. Sophomores - Emergency Room 108. Juniors - Emergency Room 110. Seniors - Emergency Room 112. Please vacate your homerooms immediately. Thank you for your cooperation."

Mr. Hamilton takes his precious time getting us out the door. We walk noisily through the hallways, even though we are supposed to be "dead silent". Our beloved teacher merely rolls his eyes and continues walking. He could care less if we all get shot. He'd probably lend our assassins a hand. I shake my head in disgust.

We eventually make it to Emergency Room 110, almost completely unscathed. One girl took an unfortunate fall. Sucks for her. All 146 Juniors crowd into the compact, windowless space. This also sucks for claustrophobic people. I'm pretty sure I see three already having a panic attack.

I attempt to turn around to gather my surroundings, but am met with a broad shoulder instead. I mumble something that not even I understood. Then I look up. It was worth the effort, that's for damn sure. There stood the only person uninterested in anything I say or do. But I missed the mark by a mile on one thing. He wasn't attractive. He was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. For some reason, his features seemed vaguely familiar. I couldn't quite place my finger on it. I stare at him for an interminable amount of time. And he stares right back, with those piercing green eyes. But just "green" doesn't even come close to describing them.

"Hello." Velvet.

"Greetings." His lip curves ever so slightly.

"As much as I'd love to chat, well, actually, I really wouldn't like to. Either way, I have somewhere else to be. I believe it's called 'Anywhere But Here.'" He waves his hand across the air, like he's describing some magical place. For example, Disney. I want to do dangerous things to his face.

"Please, be my guest." I gift him with the best phony smile I could procure. He returns one just the same, except his looks beautiful no matter how fake it is. How could someone be so stunning on the outside and be so hideous on the inside at the same time? Is it even possible to be beautiful on both sides?

He begins to walk away, but I swiftly grab his arm and face him towards me.

Then I punch him as hard as physically possible.

* * *

"Miss Swan, I'm sure you know why you are here today." Principal Clark stares at me with beady eyes.

"I believe I do recall quite clearly."

"You assaulted a fellow student."

"'Assaulted' is a little harsh, wouldn't you say? All I did was slap him."

"You almost fractured his jawbone." Well shit. Guess I had a decent right hook. My hand hurts terribly. It's worth it.

"He deserved it."

"And why would that be?"

"He's a douche."

"Isabella, please control your language."

"Sorry. It's still true, though."

"Did Mr. Cullen physically harm you in any way?" So his last name was Cullen. Why does everything about him seem so familiar?

"Nope, just verbally." She lets out a heavy sigh.

"And what exactly did he say?" And there lies the million dollar question. How do I explain to her how much of a jerk he really is?

"Well, er. I'm not really sure how to put it into words."

"Two weeks of detention after school, Miss Swan. One hour. You are dismissed."

"This is bullshit! What about him?"

"Would you like to add another week?" Would you like me to "almost" fracture your jawbone as well?

"No."

"Very well then. And to answer your question, unless you have proof of whatever you claim Mr. Cullen did to you, there's nothing I can do. Goodbye."

"Whatever," I mumble, taking a step towards the door.

"What was that?"

"Nothing. Good day, Principal Clark."

"Good day." I walk out of her office without another word, pissed off to no extent. "Mr. Cullen" will pay for this. Even more than he already has.

**You're probably wondering why "Mr. Cullen" is acting this way. But fear not, it will all make sense later on. Leave me some love (or hate). I read every single review. Love you lots! **

**Who is your favorite Twilight character? Why?**


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